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A married man of 21 years is sitting across from me in my office. His wife is horribly upset and has threatened to leave him. After a long period of silence he revealed that he engages in gay sex , softly saying, " I have had sex with men as far back as I can remember. I am not romantically attracted to men.
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The Phenomenon of ‘Bud Sex’ Between Straight Rural Men
A subset of these men who have sex with men, or MSM, live lives that are, in all respects other than their occasional homosexual encounters, quite straight and traditionally masculine — they have wives and families, they embrace various masculine norms, and so on. They are able to, in effect, compartmentalize an aspect of their sex lives in a way that prevents it from blurring into or complicating their more public identities. Sociologists are quite interested in this phenomenon because it can tell us a lot about how humans interpret thorny questions of identity and sexual desire and cultural expectations. But not all straight MSM have gotten the same level of research attention.